Faith and Heartache

I wonder if our life is going to change in the next few weeks.

We are once again hoping and praying and working on purchasing another house. We went down to take a look at it last night and it's practically perfect, but I also feel as if I've said that about so many houses, I wonder if this is really the perfect one. God knows.

The house isn't technically on the market yet, as the owner is deciding whether to remodel it to try to get a higher price. I hope not, that would possibly blow our budget and they would probably put in modifications that I wouldn't want. (carpet instead of laminate, paint colors I don't like, porcelain sink instead of stainless, etc.) We would much rather do all those things ourselves.

We could find out as early as the end of the week, or as late as a month from now what the deal is. This waiting game once again has my stomach in knots.
I was kind of hoping I wouldn't love it, because then it would be easy to say "if it happens, it happens" but my heart really does long for it. The open layout perfect for entertaining and having tons of teenagers over, the private bedrooms down the hallway, the big backyard for my kids and dog, the big side yard for my husbands toys, the open kitchen so I can still be a part of the party when I'm the hostess, the good neighborhood that I can feel safe letting my kids play outside, the closeness to our community.... my heart aches thinking that it may never be.

Oh God,
You know the desires of our heart...
I pray that you would bless us with this.
Love you.